Commander Storvik, USS Murgatroid (storvik) wrote,
Commander Storvik, USS Murgatroid

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The Murgatroid is Stunning

The modifications to the Murgatroid's phasers are complete; at least, as complete as can be given the circumstances. I have managed to "gerald-rig" (is that correct, MacAllister?) an add-on module to the ship's phasers so that, in an emergency, we can stun an area of planetary surface with a radius of approximately 0.21 kilometers, from a standard planetary orbit. Obviously, if the ship is further away, the radius could be increased; but after a certain point the beams would be too widely dispersed to have the desired effect. The difficulties faced in implementing this modification were that

  1. we do not have access to all of the materials and information that the engineers and I would have liked to have, although we were able to replicate enough to make the unit work;
  2. the unit must not in any way affect the normal workings of the ship's phasers, which are necessary for ship-to-ship combat, disintegrating projectiles, and so on; and
  3. the unit must be easily removable so that we can hide it any time Starfleet feels the need to poke around our ship. Next time we're at a starbase for maintenance, I plan to unplug the stun module and shove it into Lothar's underpants.

Because the unit is what the engineers call a "quick kludge", it will only function a limited number of times before burning out -- which rules out the idea some of the engineering staff had of going to a few planets, stunning the major population centers, and beaming up the most comely females they could find. Not that I would have allowed such a plan anyway… the last thing we need is for the Murgatroid's engineers to breed.

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